Mr Practical

I only speak of the practical things,
the tactical things of use to me.
For all else is fantastical,
and really quite abstruse to me.

Feel free to talk of bank accounts,
and money, stocks and bonds.
If it consists of logistics, then
I’m happy to respond.

But please don’t speak of silly things -
of beauty, art or love,
Or poetry, philosophy,
or if there’s god above.

Want to joke me? Don’t provoke me!
A joke’s a waste of time!
And laughter’s just a waste of air
while comedy’s a crime!

Taxes - Yes! Abstractions - No!
I think you get the gist?
Promotions? Yep! Emotions? Nope!
Just check them off your list.

So try not to be distractible
if you truly hope to thrive;
But strive always to be practical
and you’ll be practically alive!